How can you do better in nonviolent communication?
Let’s look at another difficult topic now that we have a better understanding of our reactions and feelings: determining your needs. People don’t have enough practice doing this, which is why it’s so difficult; instead, they fall into the blame game.
Because we rarely communicate our wants and then blame others for not meeting them, the blame game is a classic catch-22. We may chastise our partners for being messy when they do not satisfy our standards of orderliness, such as leaving unwashed dishes in the kitchen without communicating that we require the kitchen to be clean. And if we blame them, they’ll almost certainly feel guilty and become defensive.
